If you saw my post from last Thursday, you would have noticed I’m currently on a Tony Robbins content binge. Well, as usual, a recent video of his I was watching about, “finding your why,” got me thinking. In the video Tony recommended an exercise of stating/writing-down your reasons for pursuing the things you want to pursue.
So I wrote mine down. I mean, he’s the guru who was in Shallow Hal so… obviously I’m gonna do what he suggests.
All joking aside though, while doing it I realized it wasn’t so easy to put into words at first. Considering it further, I remembered this struggle had been echoed by many of my friends in the past. Especially if we don’t yet know the, “what,” of our pursuits, the why can be a challenge to articulate. So after I finished I decided to make a list of the factors that a why is composed of. Hopefully, these things might help you to find and express yours. If so, please share below and see how good it feels to let out!
What to consider when finding your why
1. Emotions
How does it make you feel? And please don’t be the guy/gal who says “happy.” Don’t answer in any tone below a pure, joyous one. Similes and metaphors aren’t just limited to writers. So tell me about the thing you do that ignites in you all the euphoria of floating through the air of the Aurora Borealis. This type of thing(s) exists in you, I know it does, so just let it flow. Even better if you do so in the comments below! 😉
2. Desires
Being outcome oriented can be a constructive thing, as long as you’re using it to push you to work harder today and aren’t depending on those outcomes for happiness. So consider the people you look up to. Where are they? What do they have? Why do you want to be in their position? Once you have answers to those questions, you should also have some pretty compelling reasons to work a step harder to get there.
3. Activities
This is what you enjoy about actually doing the task day-to-day. A writer writes, a gamer games, an analyst analyzes, and an athlete competes. For each there is something about the activity itself that makes them default to it. It could be an escape, a puzzle to solve, a challenge to overcome, or so many other things. What’s your activity and what is it about the process you love?
4. Avoidances
In choosing to do one thing, you’re also avoiding another. This might be even more important to you internally than the pleasure of the passion you have. Entrepreneurs and artists might say they’d do anything to escape a 9-to-5. People with a 9-to-5 might say they’d do anything to ensure security for their family and/or them. All of the above likely have avoiding poverty as a value. So you can see where the things we don’t want tend to push us toward what we want. What are you running from?
So now that we know what goes into it, here’s my, “why,” as an example for comparison.
Alright (*cracks neck*) someone hold my beer while I go off…
Breaking Bad was the beginning of something powerful for me. I was hooked from the very beginning as the twists and turns had me doling out my aunt and uncle’s Netflix account login to everyone I knew. There was no way I could contain my excitement when I found out (spoiler), and when (spoiler), and (spoiler). So I didn’t, even after the account password changed because I passed it around so many times. ;D
Now, I’m no meth-cooking science teacher, nor am I a father, husband, or resident of New Mexico. But the simultaneous love and hate I felt while watching Walter White evolve was quite simply… familiar. For all the times he built people up only to let them down. All the carnage and pain he left in his wake. Everything this man went through just to figure out one thing: who really is Walter White?
It’s a question we all ask ourselves with our name inserted in place of his. Who am I? What is my why? And am I even prepared to find out? Vince Gilligan became my hero when he presented to us, in the most explosive way possible, a journey to find the answers. He allowed me to hope, to wonder, and to learn more about myself through fantastic characters in a fantastic lens.
This is why I write.
Because I don’t want the next me to miss being inspired and excited enough to share their logins. I do it because I want to create characters so compelling and plot twists so earth shattering, you couldn’t ever forget or recover from them. Spoilers so rich it kills you not to tell your friends, while still giving you tremendous satisfaction for having seen the story unfold first. If you hadn’t, you wouldn’t have been the pioneer who found this treasure you can now share.
You, dear reader, deserve the thrills and sorrow and satisfaction I’ve felt. You deserve them over and over, delivered to you on a silver fucking platter. My why is so you can have stories to grow alongside the way I’ve grown with the ones I’ve loved.
Now you tell me about your why below and pass me back my goddamn beer.
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