N.B. Austin

American Author

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Jeannie’s Song: When the Shadows Run

Today is a HUGE day!!!! I am so thrilled and proud to say that you can now find below a full, extended version of the song “When the Shadows Run,” which Jeannie Morrell sings to herself in chapter 3 of Crimson River!

I never would have thought that I’d be able to blend my love with music with my newfound love of story-telling, so it brings me great joy to have been able to put this together.

Hope you like it and hope you’re enjoying the Civilands series!

 

Verse 1:

When you sound the call, with spirit true,

I swear I’ll hear that sound in you.

And when you run, with a head and a start,

From shadows that would break your heart,

My love you’ll see my light shine through,

Those shadows chasing after you.

So even when the black night hums,

Still don’t look back, the sun will come.

No don’t look back, the sun will come.

Chorus 1:

What you’ve seen, see once again

You will find, find what you’re missing

And the voice that I’ve left will be heard with the songs of the wind.

Still won’t leave you then.

Verse 2:

Will you focus up, ignore their stares?

Watching from the trees, they’re so unaware.

The forest calls, the river coos

Inside you have an answer too

My love this storm will, dissipate

A hurricane you’ll anticipate

So even when you hear thunder’s drums,

Still don’t look back, the sun will come.

No don’t look back, the sun will come.

Chorus 2:

What you’ve seen, see once again

You will find, find what you’re missing

And the voice that I’ve left will be heard with the songs of the wind.

All the time, time that we spend

Making sense, of what we’re given

May you break down the dam, let it bleed so the healing begins

Still won’t leave you then.

Outro:

So even when the black night hums,

Still don’t look back, the sun will come.

No don’t look back, the sun will come.

August Autobiographic Author Audit

“Is August really almost over already?” Yes. And it’s time for an author audit!

I’ve heard that question repeated a bunch in the past week and I’m just as surprised and/or in denial about it as any of them. On the one hand, football and hockey season is right around the corner! On the other hand, how can 2017 already be more than halfway over!?

Seeing as how this is the case though–and considering that I am officially 1 year into my author journey–I figured this would be a good time to update my progress on all fronts.

Some pretty beach somewhere. Author audit!

Manuscript Writing

I’m currently in the line edit phase of book 2: Crystal Eyes and still on track to release on 11.01.2017, or possibly even a little earlier. I’m also working on a short, prequel story that I’ll be posting on my various channels. It will feature Dominic Turner and the working title is The Illusionist’s Tale. Extremely excited about both and can’t wait to publish!

Script Writing

While this has taken just a bit of a backseat to manuscript writing and platform development, I am making good progress so far on episode 1 of the series. It has been really fun to learn screen writing and translating the book into a screenplay. In a way, it’s almost like writing another story entirely. More on this in the future once some other processes wind down.

Amazon

I recently did my first giveaway on Amazon and ran it alongside sponsored product advertising, which resulted in 40 copies moved over what was essentially a weekend. With my strategy here being to get as many copies of Crimson River read (and hopefully reviewed!) before the release of Crystal Eyes, I considered this move a win.

Wattpad

I’ve wanted to provide a full update as a follow-up to my post about starting off on Wattpad, but I’m still giving it more time to learn the ropes. For now I’ll say that I’ve really enjoyed the creativity of so many users on this site and the community around sharing stories! I think this is a great platform for getting reads, feedback, and just finding like-minded people in general. Like I said, more in-depth details to come, but so far so good.

Goodreads

There’s still a lot for me to learn about how to effectively leverage this site. I did recently get a new review, a couple of “to-read” designations, some new friends, and joined some lists. While I am making progress there for sure, I know there’s still so much more ground to gain. I think, like anything, it will be a slow accumulation over time–especially since this is a social media for book reading. For now though, I’m going to try to focus more on the groups, making friends by reading along with those who have similar interests. Like with Wattpad, I will probably provide an end-of-year progress report and, “what I’ve learned,” post for this site alone with more progress.

YouTube

As stated in my first Enter Civilands video (in all honesty, my first real, solo YouTube channel video EVER) I’m thrilled to be getting started on there. Not only is it a fun way to connect with people by getting passive face-time, but being involved with film of any kind is quenching my screenwriting thirst–even if only in a small way for now. Talking about a world I built and love makes it even better 😉 Obviously I’m still brand new and learning the ropes, so further updates later.

Twitter

I’m gonna be honest here… I’m not really a big fan of Twitter. Maybe I should be and maybe I will be over time. But right now it’s kind of the last social media I use for authoring. That being said, I like using GIF’s a lot. If every post could be just GIF’s I wouldn’t complain.

If you have any thoughts on any of the above, let me know what you think. Otherwise, thanks for reading and hope your enjoying the Civilands series!

 

 

Inspiration Behind the Series Pt. 2

Happy Thursday August 17, 2017 and welcome to the Enter Civilands blog 🙂 Today I’ll be continuing on the topic of my inspiration behind the Civilands series with part 2 of the thread. Feel free to check out part 1, in which I talk about how this story was impacted by everyone’s favorite: Game of Thrones. Also, I am really excited to say that I’ll be expanding Enter Civilands to YouTube soon and have some juicy character bios in the works which should include portraits of each of the main P.O.V. characters!

Crimson River books. Inspiration behind the Civiands series.

So what was the next thing that inspired the series . . ?

Manifest Destiny.

Epics like Game of Thrones and Lord of the Rings define the fantasy genre. They create worlds where anything is possible and the stakes are tremendous because of it. But at the same time, they got me thinking: why are fantasy stories mostly so focused on the medieval time period?

Now granted, there is probably some kind of historical background or something behind it that I’m sure avid historians would yell like the answer is one everybody should know–all the power to you and you’re probably right, my historian friends! But whatever the explanation is, it couldn’t satisfy me to hear.

And thus, Civilands digs into this time period–this wild, controversial, pre-industrial time period. What it reveals along the way is the spirit that inspired all the chaos, cruelty, and romanticism of the era. That spirit comes to life because:

From the first days of colonization, we have thought it our privilege and our destiny to go west.

Whether it was for wealth, for power, or even just for a new life altogether, people have always and will always view the west as a territory unexplored. And in that there are so many uncertainties.

  • There could be people there who we’re unfamiliar with . . . Will we learn from them, with them, or at their expense?
  • There could be wildlife there that could be incredibly dangerous or equally docile . . . Will we adapt to it, slaughter it, or let it eat us alive?
  • The land itself could be plentiful or it can be barren . . . Will we explore its majesty, cultivate and create, or starve and destroy?

Inspiration behind the Civilands series. A canoe by the River in Austin, TX.

But these questions do not stop us and they will never stop us.

So we go forth anyway because it’s thrilling. Because even if there is danger, we want to say we faced it and came out alive or even stronger. Because the things we can see along the way are not what we’re accustomed to and it’s in our nature to conquer.

There is opportunity in it too—much more so than if you stay home. Your opportunity is bred from a dream of power. Power that you don’t experience now here as an ordinary citizen. But there? There you can become anything, good or bad, and you will find your true nature along the way. You might not make it out alive at all. But you could become a king. You could become a god.

Of course, you aren’t a god and never will be.

You think you’re stronger than you are and your desire for change and for power pushes you to do things you might not otherwise.

What if the land you sought for was not like our own? What if its inhabitants had abilities that you didn’t have and fought back in ways you couldn’t? How would you react to them and could you justify this life over the simplicity of an already developed city back east? Will your moral code need to be broken along the way or will you hold true? What about the ones you love? Will you be able to give them what they need in this hectic environment? Will you even be able to maintain sight of that?

This is what’s explored through Latera and Hanzah of the native V’ahani clan; through Elan and Malik of the native Tokali clan; through the Morrells, Keagans, and others who each come to the Murrieta Territory for something different–or is it really that different?

I really hope you dive in with me on the journey and find out!

Thanks so much for reading and hope you’re enjoying the Civilands series 🙂 Let me know what you thought in the comments below and/or feel free to share it if you enjoyed!

Inspiration Behind the Series Pt. 1

To start, I want to welcome you to the first post in my new segment Enter Civilands. In these posts I’ll discuss all things behind the series, including character bios, information on the world, and additional bonus content.

Today we begin with what inspired me to write this series. Since there’s so much that goes into the inspiration and it’s also something that expands/shifts over time, I’m going to make this itself a multi-part post.

So for my first influence in this wild journey: Game of Thrones (the TV show).

Behind the series. Forest in my Long Island backyard.

I have very much been an enthralled beneficiary of the television renaissance we’ve experienced in the Netflix era. Shows like Breaking Bad and Fargo shaped my understanding of high quality plot and character development.

That being said… the Game of Thrones series–which I made my way through in about as unrealistically short a time period as anyone who watches it–was what first planted the seed in my mind that I wanted to be a story-teller.

So many characters, plot-lines, and world-building. All of it is tied together with such expert care in a way that’s shocking each and every season. This is the kind of entertainment that you don’t simply consume, but you live right alongside the characters and feel their struggles like they were your own.

This is so much the case, that I actually saw a tribute video the other day which was made for Jamie Lannister. We’re talking about a character who begins the series by pushing a young boy out of tower for catching Jaime sleeping with his own sister! Yet he’s praised. Why? Because he’s portrayed in a way that is entirely human: flawed for certain, but also, at the core, not all bad.

Behind the series. Crimson River Book.

All these things heavily influenced my work on the Civilands Series in the following ways:

World building

Civilands focuses on the fight for control and power in the mysterious Murrieta Territory. The territory spans the entire western half of the continent of Duresia, separated from the growing, pre-industrial cities of the eastern half, by the north-south Chorisma River. While there is no throne yet constructed in this newborn expanse, the theme of several distinct players remains. The stakes rise as they fight to build their one of their own.

Not “good and evil,” but “human”

As mentioned, this is what Game of Thrones does best. I believe the large majority of people mean to do good, even if they don’t understand how to do it. They will make mistakes sometimes and/or be too greedy. But they will also have a reason to do so in mind at the time. And yea, occasionally you’ll get a maniac like Joffrey, or Clovis Keagan in the case of Civilands. But even these deranged characters are that way for a human reason. We may not forgive them for their actions, but we need to understand their pain.

The fantasy element

This was an area of extreme inventiveness for George R.R. Martin, especially mixing a world of zombies with a medieval type fantasy. In my series, the native V’ahani and Tokali clans’ superhuman connection to the land was a layer of complexity I thought interesting to explore. In American history, by contrast, Native Americans were over-powered in terms of technology. Leveling the playing field a bit through this wrinkle in this new world was my own fantasy element and one that will continue to develop as the series progresses. While Daenerys has her dragons, Latera stands tall with the V’ahani grizzlies.

Twists, twists, twists

Realistic, believable ones though, which drive the plot forward. I can’t expand here on Civilands for obvious reasons and I won’t spoil GoT either. But this show taught me about delivering the unexpected when those watching/reading are least ready for it. So buckle your seat belts and prepare to gasp!

If you made it this far or even skipped to here, thanks so much for joining me! 😀 I look forward to continuing our exploration of both worlds and hope you are enjoying the Civilands Series!

 

 

Cooperstown, NY (Overcoming Odds Short Story)

Today I entered my first Wattpad contest, which was about overcoming odds. It had the following prompt:

Your challenge is to create a 500-word short story about a time you felt successful, despite the odds being stacked against you.

Below is my submission! It’s a true story from my baseball days and forever a great memory. The lesson is that hope is never lost until you decide it is. Enjoy!

Overcoming odds. Me in the previous, BETTER Yankee Stadium.

11 years ago, baseball was my entire life. The diamond was the place I could escape and create and battle alongside my brothers. In a lot of ways, what writing does for me now, baseball did for me then.

My favorite memory from my days playing that game is also one that taught me a lesson I’ll carry with me throughout my life.

During the summer of 2006, the coach of my travel team assembled a group of players to go to Cooperstown All Star Village to play in the national tournament there. Teams from all over the country came to camp out and play ten games for the chance of winning it all.

For the first few games, we cruised by and won each contest—that is, until we played the team from Texas. Consider that my first experience of everything being bigger in my future home-state.

These boys definitely had the size on us and since we were deep into the tournament at this point, we were running out of options at pitcher. So, despite my not being a go-to choice, it had to be me that would be thrown in against the big Texas bats.

If you think that’s the extent of the hill we had to climb though, you haven’t even heard about the first inning . . .

Without getting so much as an out, my pitching debut in Cooperstown began by giving up two three-run home runs AND a grand slam. So at 10-0 by the bottom of the second, consider the odds to have been officially stacked.

As you can imagine, at this point my confidence level wasn’t all that high. My teammates couldn’t have been thrilled either, though they’d never show me that and kept supporting me throughout. In my mind, our championship run would be ruined and it was all my fault.

Enter—my dad.

Once I was back in the dugout, head in my hands, he approached me from behind the chain link fence. Instead of giving me some kind of epic speech though, what he told me and the teammates by my side is that he bet one of the fathers on the Texas team a beer that we would still win the game . . .

Cue my eye roll, my teammates’ hilarity, and the understanding that even now we were still in this game because our heads were back in it.

What came next wasn’t just a thrilling comeback, but a 20-0 onslaught in which we made a statement that this tournament was ours. The game ended 20-10, and from then on we kept our foot on the gas all the way to an undefeated National Championship title.

In the end it taught me that there’s always hope if you want something bad enough.

Perhaps most importantly though, my dad got his beer! And even though I was only 13, I understood just how sweet it must have tasted.

Thanks for reading!

Feel free to go vote on Wattpad here. Hope you enjoyed and hope you’re enjoying the Civilands series 🙂

What If You Succeed?

It’s the weekend and the editing process for book 2 has begun!

If you succeed, you get cool pictures by the lake.

I’m once again working with Refine Editing and going through the same three-stage process of manuscript assessment, line edit, and copy edit. What’s different this time around though, as I await the delivery of the manuscript assessment, is that I’m feeling the butterflies of anticipation.

The first time I delivered book 1, I felt calm and was fully prepared for the high level review of the assessment to be devastating. Since that was my first book ever, my expectation was that I’d get torn apart and called out as the fraud I was sure I was for trying to randomly take on this author thing . . .

Alright, that might be exaggerated just a bit 😉

I felt at the time I did have something worth the effort to have edited. But despite this confidence I wasn’t expecting praise of any kind.

When the assessment did arrive, the review for the story itself was glowing. Don’t get me wrong, there was a lot of technical work to be done. However, I literally cheered and laughed maniacally at all the positives which were pointed out. With Crimson River now published, I’ve also gotten great reviews and feedback thus far.

However, this is the scary part about book 2. The following question burns in my mind: Am I still a fraud?

Again, kind of tongue in cheek, but also kind of not. Basically, what I think it comes down to is a fear of success and living up to that success in the future.

What if book 2 sucks? What if every book/story I ever write in the future sucks?

The answer: It doesn’t matter!

The reason: At the time I started writing on my freshman effort–one measly year ago–my life was just coming back together after a tough period of transition. Getting in the head-space I needed to be in to start something new took time, a move, a bunch of other activities, and a dog. Eventually though, I got there. In a way, maybe at first I was writing for therapy. But from the first minute of it to the last I was taking what I was doing very seriously.

The obstacle was never really what, “they,” would all think of my work. Instead, it was how much I believed in the story I wanted to tell. To create despite the deep fear of how your creative expression will change you as a person. This takes a lot more courage than it does to hit the, “send,” button. The same goes for any other creative process you might be working on too!

All in all, completing the writing for book 2 was a triumph in itself. I learned my passion for story-telling is very much real. Whatever comes of the assessment or any future assessment will come. I loved writing this dark, emotional, gritty, hopeful story. Can’t wait to do it again on book 3 and beyond!

If you succeed, you get to make cool dedications to your brother.

Some side notes and other journey updates:

  • To the right is the book 2 dedication, which is for the best brother a guy could have. I really like having fun with my dedications. Being a songwriter probably contributes to their rhyme-y and/or poem-y flow.
  • The episode 1 teaser scene for my first ever screenplay is complete! I am way too excited to be writing the Civilands series in TV screenplay format. Will keep you posted on my experiences with that as they develop.
  • The season 1 screenplay, publishing book 2, and writing book 3 will be my official goals for the rest of 2017.

As always, thanks so much for reading. I’d love to hear any thoughts you might have below and hope you’re enjoying the Civilands series!

Things I’m Struggling With

Over the past year and a half, I’ve been figuring out the path I want to venture on in life. Doing so has made me realize the grind of achieving your dreams is as difficult as advertised. While this is not a complaint or something I didn’t fully expect, it’s a hard road and sometimes you gotta vent out what you’re struggling with.

So without further adieu, here are the things stressing me out at this point in the mission…

The not-producing-enough paradox

Struggling. Walking through an alley.

Basically, a year ago to the day was when I randomly decided to try and write a book. Now here I sit with one published book, a second written, a TV show pitch written, and the beginning of a screenplay drafted. I’m also in better shape than I was a year ago, have a better diet, am making and keeping more friends, and know I’m on the right path overall.

What I’m coming to find though, is that the more productive I am now becoming, the more I feel guilty for any time I spend not working. I don’t know yet if this is a symptom of still being new to this lifestyle or a just a thing in general, but I’ve used the following to try and ease my anxieties:

Working out

While this is technically still part of working toward something, intense activity always chills me out. Also, there is something about waking up sore that makes you feel like you’ve been productive, even if you took a day off on everything else.

Emotional Freedom Technique

I don’t remember where exactly I was referred to this method. It’s amazing what it can do though, in terms of bringing you to a state of relaxation. The technique involves tapping at different parts of your body. As silly as this may sound, the feeling you get if you follow the instructions moves through each part of you. Check it out for yourself here and feel the difference.

Meditation

This is the least effective of the three for me, but if you can effectively shut your mind off then I could definitely see the benefit. The easiest thing about it too is that–for the most part–there doesn’t seem to be a, “right,” way to do it.

The time/fear-to-jump conundrum

“Juggling is hard. Much of the time it is also not wise.”

~Chieftain Orrin in Civilands book 2: Crystal Eyes

A common theme of any experienced reward is that a risk was involved. As a math person by trade though, my mind tends to aim toward taking calculated risks. This is what brings me to the question of when is the right time to just act.

I believe there is a difference between passion and stupidity so right now I’m trying to find a gap. All evidence from successful people points to my being wrong. Many advise to go all out right this minute. But I just don’t know if I’m ready to topple the house I’ve built yet. In my head I’m still drawing the blueprints for a new one.

For the time being, I’m going to keep plugging away until I hit a clear ceiling of some kind. My constant anxiety is wondering if I’d even be able to recognize it when I do. But I’m hoping I can because it isn’t easy to jump blindly.

The need-to-fit-in-to-be-accepted fallacy

On average I think I handle this pretty well and don’t worry too much about what others think or do. But most everyone wants to be accepted by their peers in some way, shape, or form.

Sometimes I worry about grooming, dressing, and saying the, “right,” thing at times. The issue with these for me is actually that I know the solution: stop giving a fuck. Knowing this solution sometimes leads to the other extreme though, which is worrying that I’m also not caring too much. Certainly enough of a circle to make one feel quite unsure of them self!

So here I think it might be best to find a balance in between, though I’m obviously still working on it. The trick is to convince your brain to always own whatever it is you want to be. Compromising based on what you think others want is the enemy.

The truth of it is that most people live their own lives and aren’t looking to make sure every detail of you is perfect. For those that do judge you, they likely aren’t worth the second thought anyway. If you be you and own that, your confidence will be infectious.

The way I know I should be thinking

Struggling, but why, when this man can so gracefully enjoy a pineapple.
Source: Reddit

Life is really very simple–too much so to take overly seriously. You shouldn’t hold yourself back from the things you want and it’s important to love and accept who you are inside and out.

Which brings me to this guy to the left who you might be wondering about…

Whilst experiencing the anxiety of the not-producing-enough paradox, I came across a Reddit post about this fellow who tried and failed several times to grow a pineapple. The man apparently failed enough times that when he finally succeeded, he took the pineapple to a professional photographer.

In the picture you can see that he was too excited to document this moment to even put on shoes. Beyond the shoes though, the grin on his face is so slight that there is almost a relief in it. Looking at his face you can hear his thoughts screaming with all the rage and fury of success, “Well, gosh darn it, I did it!” I’m almost certain this man has given human life to an actual child. But there is something about the vibrance of green in his pineapple. It would help me understand if he were to say that this was his crowning moment. The fulfillment is a sight to behold.

Moving past the tongue-in-cheek though

The simplicity of living for the little victories in life is the lesson here. This kind of happiness and pride should be what we all aspire for in all that we do. For me, receiving my first hard copy of book 1 was one of those moments. Times like that make any mental struggles I’m feeling now seem pretty insignificant!

Hope you enjoyed reading and are enjoying the Civilands series! Let me know in the comments below what you thought, what struggles you might be going through, and how you’re dealing with them as well.